People I Don't Care About

I was reading my US magazine on Monday, which arrived almost a week after I usually get it so the "news" was way stale, and got through it in about seven minutes--half of my usual 15. People, I really look forward to those weekly 15 minutes that it takes to go from the front cover to the back. It is my time to set aside all intellectual pretenses and claims to taste to wallow, wallow, in the muck and stupidity that makes up pop culture.

In my defense, I only receive US because it was a Christmas gift last year and it's the only super trashy magazine I get. And guess what? I really frickin' like it. Or at least I used to. I'm getting old, there's no way around that and, perhaps, it means my level for gossip subjects has become if not more refined, definitely more limited. (The topics always remain the same, it's only the names and faces that change.)

For instance, I should care about Madonna and Guy Ritchie's divorce. Both of them are on the high end of my age demographic. But I don't care and haven't paid much attention to her antics since the mid-90s. Even then I would just pretend to be interested because a friend of mine was really into her and he liked to talk about her a lot. She's boring and ever present. Like every time I turn on the radio on a weekend--a Prairie Home Companion is on. Always and without fail. I used to like a Prairie Home Companion until I realized it was on all the time and it was always the same thing.

I also can't believe I've wasted time skimming anything to do with the dipshits who expose their vacuousness on that show The Hills. Honestly, the show and these people should come with a warning from the Surgeon General: "Watching, reading or thinking about any non-personality associated, connected or affiliated with The Hills will cause a slow but steady leeching of brain cells." I don't care that they don't have pimples or cellulite, they're just not worth the space they inhabit on TV, in my US and on blogs. I can't help, though, but admire the marketing genius that has made way too many people aware of them. Fuck, even I can name most of them even though I only have watched maybe 10 minutes of the show.

I could go on and on, but I would just be feeding the monster. There's no reason I should know about these people and their problems, but I do because I read this crap. Hell, not only read it but actively seek it out. This makes me complicit in the lowering of my already compromised standards of what's fit to consume through my eyes and ears. Since I know I'm not going to chuck my TV and, try as I might, my fingers will still wander on the keyboard to take me to those blogs I know I shouldn't waste time on, I'll do my bit by asking for my US magazine not to be renewed this Christmas.

Thursdays just won't be the same and maybe that's a good thing.

2 comments:

Skydoll said...

Very funny! I recently cancelled my subscription. Though, I must admit, I do get excited when I find a copy on the airplane, and I will, at times, actually purchase a copy at the grocery store, depending who is on the cover. :) I'm down to Vanity Fair, Domino, Writer, Real Simple, and Martha Stewart. Martha is the next one on the chopping block.

Margo Candela said...

I'm axing magazines, too. Elle and Harper's Bazaar are going bye-bye. They're just too boring and, sadly, I can't relate. I'm on the fence about In Style, though. It's so nicely put together, it takes me a while to realize there's really nothing in there. Kind of like eating celery. You realize you're making an effort but when you're done you wonder if it was worth it.