I'm not pregnant but...

...this summer I'm going to dress like I am. Really. And it's not because I'm suffering from pregnant lady envy. Far from it, actually. If I could express my singular joy at not being knocked up with a series of celebratory cartwheels, I'd happily do so but I don't want to risk pulling any essential typing muscles.

I'm putting my jeans in storage for the rest of the summer and will be spending most of my days in dresses to take advantage of the warmer weather and the fact that I work by myself and it doesn't matter if I keep my knees together. Also, since I should be focused on something else, a dress is one easy piece that'll cover both my halves without the worry of having to match things. Plus, people think a gal in a dress sort of cares about, you know, stuff like shaving her legs and combing her hair. I don't mind riding on some other hard grooming lady's coattails.

As I'm adherent to the Einstein theory of dressing: wear the same basic outfit everyday and free up valuable gray matter to noodle on more important things--like relativity and reality TV. The dresses below were purchased in multiples, but in different colors of the same style. And even though I'm dressing je suis enceinte, I'm not going barefoot. And since nothing cheers me up more than red shoes, I've indulged in two which I'll rotate through all summer long.

From top left and middle: Cross front tie dress in retro violet, $39.50, Old Navy Maternity, (online only) and smocked empire waist dress in red strip, $24.50, also from Old Navy Maternity. Top right: Bateau neck 3/4 sleeve jersey dress in dark slate, $88 but I got it in store at J. Crew for about half on final sale. Technically, it's not a maternity dress, but you could have fooled me as it's roomy and can accommodate bumps of many sizes.
Bottom from left: Red patent rsvp Marian sandal, $55, via zappos.com; red leather Lolla flats by Gabriella Rocha, $60, also from zappos.com.

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